Water Your Worth

There is a church nearby where we are now and I have been pleased to see how very different they operate as they focus on the lesser by giving breakfast, showers and clothes to those in need with open doors to all who are ready to worship and receive the message. It is impressive how they have considered everything and are really providing for what looks like the entire town that is without – it is beautiful and as I went to the first service I felt the Holy Spirit’s presence, a quiet connection saying to me, “for those who care for the least of these, does to me”. I know very intimately how it feels and what it means to be cared for and also to care for others and how closely He stays to us through it all, so seeing this church operate like this and also to be in it was moving.

This past Sunday the church was finishing the book of Judges and I knew this returning to the church for service and knew how tough this book is and especially the last portion… yet something kept me open and ready to be there and receive the message knowing that He had something for me. As the scripture is read out loud there is a very real and necessary discomfort that covers the space from all. The woman who was given this teaching knew how difficult this was and focused intently on the proper things that we needed in order to focus on God. Accountability as a whole, responsibility as an individual, the moment of redirection and surrender to God knowing He is ALL and the levels of authority… all tough things and yet led with such humility and grace. I could feel the hearts shifting realizing that there has to be a change with a greater focus in the one who has the very real and ultimate power in all.

The part that caught my attention and I felt God presenting to me to digest and heal with is when she talked about how the concubine of this levite ran away at one point and was away for four months before the master came to retrieve her from her father’s. She then said, “I don’t know about you but if my husband and I had an argument and I just took off and did not receive any call, text or searching for during a four month time I think it would be pretty safe to say that he just doesn’t care about me.” This is where I thought about how much I have grown, how little I thought of myself before and what I allowed in my past. I felt myself go, ‘what a fool I was’ which continued into thinking about, ‘what would have actually happened if I accepted before that I was not wanted or cared for, if I never took the repeated efforts in connecting and ultimately making a move to attempt a family…?’ This was immediately botched as I was convicted on how I needed to go through everything in order to satisfy the truth in that and to see more completely. Then I got the opportunity to confirm the miraculous ways my child and I were led to leave as well. Everything really was done in such a way to bring me in to the now quick response of, ‘I would never allow that now.’ As I sat with all of this more leading up to this post I felt the comfort of our Father reminding me, “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.” with the added confirmation sweetly whispered to me, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.”

Fortunatley, unfortunately (often the same side of the coin) we as humans have to go through some tough experiences which turn in to lessons that hopefully draw us closer to or re-united with our Father. I am grateful for all the ways that I have learned and grown. I am grateful for all the participants along the way. Not only am I grateful, I forgive and love them all because I know that it is only through the grace given to me that I have been given the opportunity to become who I am supposed to be even still. I know that we are all wounded, hurt and sinners and it is only through Him our savior, Jesus Christ, and the blood He shed for us that we have the perfect ability to come to Him as His. In this, we have this miraculous shift in seeing our worth from other people to knowing that we are worthy because He said He made us on purpose and has plans for us. Wow, what a great leader we have in Jesus! The more we seek Him, follow Him and strive to be more like Him the more we realize just how perfect His views of us are. Hallelujah!

Your worth, our worth, will never be able to be shown properly from/through another human. Take more time with Him and feel how truly valuable you are.